Friday, September 30, 2011


The thing about being observant, is that sometimes you see things below the surface.

Things not meant for you to see.

Things you shouldn't see.

Things you wouldn't want to.

And unfortunately, we can't un-see what has been seen.

I saw something.

It made me sad.

My whole body went weak.

I know.

I knew.

From the beginning of the end, I knew this was going to happen.

After all, I was the one that set things in motion.

I was the one that created the perfect condition for it to succeed.

How do I know this? Its happened before.

Arrogantly I told someone I hoped it would happen, for everyone's benefit.

Well, it did.

Serves me right.

I just... I just...

Didn't expect it to be so soon.

My walls aren't up yet. But now they're crushed to debris.

I've got to be strong. Chin up.

This is what you wished for.


I shall disappear. As I have done before.

Time heals all wounds.

If only it did not leave scars.


Thursday, September 15, 2011

Does this mean you're moving on?

New job is hectic.

Deadlines need to be chased.

OTs are near-compulsory.

12-hour working days are normal. (9am - 9pm).

I barely have time for anything else other than work and sleep.

I guess things happen for a reason.

But I like it.

Its tough, it demands me to do my best, what more could I ask for in a job?

I was being chased for this project, and the only thing left to do was submit the drawings.

The drafter still hasn't finished it. So I went to see him.

Turns out he was chatting on the phone.

I walk up to him, he notices me, and says to the person on the phone,

"Ey kejap eh, ada engineer ni..."

I had not realised what I am now.

That one sentence made my day.