the dark side

the thing about doing your final internship report is that, after spending the whole day writing something, the last thing you'd look for to escape your days work is write a blog....

and that is the reason i did not blog in june. :)

anyways, still working on the final report, still a little bit lazy to write my blog, but ive been putting it off for too long, so here goes.

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cant think of anything. sigh.

okay starting for real now.

life is pretty simple for me now. been going to work late, and coming home early, and not doing much work in between. lol. (no, this is not a smiley of one guy holding both his hands up, its L.O.L, as in laugh out loud. zzz)

with the coming of the juniors, (i have 2 under me btw), life has been pretty sweet. i passed all my tasks to them, saying its all part of  the "hands-on training". hoho. smart eh. while they're toiling away with the hard labour, im chilling at the lab, away from my supervisors' eyes, and doing my final internship report, and some facebooking as well. hihi. okay, sometimes maybe more fb-ing than report-writing.

actually i did mean what i said about the "hands-on training". i really did mean for them to learn everything while im still there. (if you actually thought im bullying my juniors coz im super lazy, shame on you!). coz honestly my senior did a pretty bad job of passing the torch on. and i dont wanna be a pain like her now do I?

anyhow, since my tasks are now divided amongst two people, its not that bad for them. they still have time to chill. which is good, i think. too much stress is never good.

i'd like to think i have a very high tolerance to stress. or as my kelantanese roommate once put it, "a very high ignorance level". or as I'd like to put it, I'm just uber cool. haha.

but to be frank, I'm not that cool actually. I always get stressed out. sometimes for the smallest of reasons. it's just that i don't show it. i have a very emotionless face sometimes. a friend i once went out with said i'd make a very bad haggler (i.e : penawar harga barang jadi rendah). coz even if the price was real pricey, i'd not show the slightest hint of shock or any relevant emotion whatsoever (coz i can't think of another emotion one would portray at the moment. see how emotionless i am sometimes?! lol)

i try to keep my cool. it would probably be uncool to show how shocked you are at the price of a GFX card for example (find the word that shows im a computer addict). however, that uncoolness would probably get you a better price. which is probably why sometimes girls make better hagglers. (yes, in general guys ar cooler than girls. haha) which is also why i always bring my mother along when i plan on buying something expensive. haha.

okay, ive lost track of what i was saying and do not know how to proceed.

oh, did i mention my internship ends next week?

(refer back here later)

WOOT!

(woot! is kinda like yeay!, only more nerdy)

ah, sidetracking a bit. please dont be too offended if i type or text you "wtf". its not as offensive as you might think. it depends on the usage really. usually, if a wtf is preceded or followed by a lol, as in "lol wtf" or "wtf lol", its not meant to be hurtful. really depends on the occasion you're using it and who you're using it with. an appropriate example would be saying to your close friend "bodoh la ko..". its not offensive as compared to saying it to someone you JUST met. get it? :)

(if you still dont get it then stfu and dont use wtf k. haha. lol.)

the reason for the long explanation is that i said lol wtf to someone the other day, and she got upset. guess she's not that big of a cyber geek as me. lol wtf. haha.

ah. since im elaborating so much on the use of internet shortforms, maybe i should explain a few here....

wait, that would be boring...

wait again, it already IS boring...

....

moving on, lol.

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(i seem to be stuck. crap.)

sigh, if only i could type up my report as fast as this. haha. as of right now, my report is around 7000 words long. if im not mistaken it was 6000 words yesterday. not bad eh. i jokingly said to a friend the other day, in malay, "this is  6 months work cramped into a few weeks!". "how so?", the friend asks. "coz my blog is roughly 1000 words per entry and i only write once a month, and that's if im feeling hardworking... (rasa rajin. lol)."

lol.

i am never good at goodbyes or anything that's remotely sad. despite my cool exterior (lol), i am quite soft on the inside (except for the bones). i tend to suddenly reminisce on all the good times ive spent with that person and suddenly feel the need to justify all the un-nice things he / she has done to me, and suddenly feel sad that he / she is leaving.

and it is a feeling that sucks. zzzz.

(no, the "zzzz" does not mean ive fallen asleep.)

(although it COULD mean someone reading this has. lol.)

okay, getting back to what i was saying (please refer back). my internship finishes next week. it is a mixture of feelings. im feeling glad, and also slightly sad. regardless of how much i disliked the tons of work, the un-appreciation of work or effort, the being-looked-down-upon feeling, there were some good times. to say that i totally hated the experience would be a lie. all in all, it was a very good learning experience, no matter how hard it may be at times, i enjoyed and will cherish every moment of the 32 weeks journey.

for a 20 year old boy (yes i still think im a boy, thank you), 8 months is quite a long time. and now its coming to an end. im awfully happy that its finally coming to an end. haha. (told ya it was a mixture of feelings).

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yea, im running out of things to say.

last week, one of the trainees at J&J finished her internship period (not the other period ok. lol). i am unsure how it happened, but me and her ended up exchanging farewell gifts with each other. lol. she gave me this glass tablet with a poem titled "friendship" engraved on it. which i must say is extremely thoughtful.

i, being the extremely-good-at-picking-gifts guy that i am, bought her a mug.

yes, a mug.

and painted on that mug is.....

(adding a pause to create excitement and anticipation)

"Good Morning. Let the stress begin!"

how thoughtful.

wtf. wtf. wtf. wtf.

i was cursing myself the entire trip back home after work. in defense of myself and my extremely inappropriate gift, i was looking for something to give to her that upon looking on it, would definitely remind her of the fun and crazy me.

not the heartless, sorry-excuse-for-a friend me.

besides cursing myself and being the laughing stock of the friend that drove me home, i was frantically thinking of how to salvage this situation (or friendship, perhaps). i mean, one gift can change everything! and so, after my friend's laughter has died out (although i swear i can still hear him laughing after dropping me off), i followed my most feminine instincts (lol) and texted from the heart.

with fingers crossed, i texted (although how one would text / sms with his fingers crossed is beyond me)

"Hello. Saya sudah buka u punya hadiah. So touching :) Probably shud hav given u something similar, but then it wud not be sumthing that reminds u of me especially. :) Take care!"

Fingers still crossed, i waited for the reply.

First 30 seconds passed, no reply.

5 minutes, still no reply.

10 minutes, nothing.

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zzzz.

(I fell asleep)

lol. i just came back from work, of course im tired!

and then it came. it woke me up from the nap i accidentally took with my fingers still crossed (which is probably not good for the fingers, but who cares really). half awake, i read the reply.

"Haha, ur cup realy wil make me remember u always, if have destiny, hope we can meet again, take care also, yaxin from johnsin & johnsin :-D"

FUH! LEGA!

that was a close one.

in my semi-conscious state, i almost replied " bukan cup la, mug.", but thank God my brain was functioning more properly than when i bought the mug.

note to self : when buying a gift for a girl next time, ignore all sense of sarcasm and buy something lovey dovey.

there is a very fine line between being nice and being mean. good and evil. funny sarcasm and not-funny-at-all-borderline-cruel sarcasm. pray you don't accidentally slip to the dark side.

till next time, cheers!

take care.

ciao. :)

p/s : in case your wondering, johnsin & johnsin is not a typo error, just a friend joke that me and the ppl at J&J understand. although yaxin might be a typo. or she doesn't know how to spell my name. lol. at least we're still talking :P