bulan bahasa kebangsaan 2

sedar tidak sedar telah setahun berlalu dari kali terakhir saya menaip dalam bahasa Melayu. (jika ingin membaca boleh lah klik di sini).terlalu banyak yang telah berlaku sepanjang masa setahun ini, mana mungkin semua itu diceritakan ke dalam bentuk kata-kata.

(bila difikirkan semula, ianya mampu dilakukan, tetapi saya pun tidak sanggup hendak menaipnya.)

jika sebelum ini saya telah mempunyai buah fikiran tentang apa yang hendak dikisahkan, malangnya kali ini saya tidaklah begitu bernasib baik, hanya sekadar niat hendak menaip sambil membanggakan bahasa bangsa.

secara amnya, saya amatlah menyayangi bahasa dan bangsa saya ini. mana mungkin digantikan bahasa nenek moyang saya ini dengan bahasa penjajah. sebelum saya lahir lagi, dengan bahasa inilah bapa saya yang kacak berkenal-kenalan dengan ibu saya yang lawa, dengan bahasa inilah ibu saya dodoikan saya ketika saya bermain bola sepak di dalam kandungannya (walaupun apabila dilahirkan kaki bertukar bangku), dengan bahasa inilah arwah datuk saya membelikan saya makanan kegemaran saya sampai sekarang iaitu aiskrim, dengan bahasa inilah opah saya menjaga saya sampai ke besar dan dengan bahasa ini juga lah saya bergaduh dengan adik saya masa kecil-kecil dahulu.

sekarang saya masih kecil tetapi adik saya agak besar. ha ha ha. oh tapi suara saya besar.

tetapi tidak pula saya merasakan perasaan sayang kepada bahasa dan bangsa itu terserlah dari khalayak ramai. masing-masing beriya-iya hendak merupakan diri itu seperti bangsa lain, dengan rambut daripada hitam diwarnakan ke kuning untuk menyerupai bangsa Saiya yang super, mata coklat gelap di birukan agar sedondon dengan penyedia perkhidmatan prabayar, dan pakaian kebangsaan ditinggalkan pula dan digantikan dengan pakaian yang mengalahkan peragawati Victoria's Secret.

bukanlah saya tahu sangat tentang peragawati Victoria's Secret dan bagaimana pula pakaian Adriana Lima dan Gisele Bundchen tu, kebetulan sahaja sesekali sesekala terpandang sekali dua. Jarang terpandang kali ketiga.

berbalik kepada tajuk asal saya, terlalu ramai yang tidak lagi mahu menjadi Melayu, sebaliknya berlumba-lumba melupakan bangsa kita yang megah dengan adat dan adab ini.

apakah kurang cantiknya perempuan Melayu? begitu cantik sekali si Puteri Gunung Ledang sehinggakan Sultan Melaka sanggup menghabiskan harta kekayaannya untuk menjayakan projek mega berupa jambatan emas dan perak dari Melaka ke kaki Gunung Ledang.

hati saya mengatakan Puteri Gunung Ledang itu tidaklah memakai kanta sentuh berwarna kelabu. dan jauh sekali mewarnakan rambutnya seperti warna rambut orang utan.

apakah tidak menarik hati lelaki Melayu? jika tidak, mana mungkin Salleh Yaakob berkahwin empat.

(kenyataan di atas mampu berdiri sendiri tanpa sebarang pengukuhan.)

apakah tidak indah bahasa Melayu itu? amatlah mudah untuk dipelajari, namun terlalu sukar untuk dikuasai. nampak senang untuk difahami, amat dalam makna tersembunyi.

apakah tidak halus adat Melayu itu? tidak ada bangsa yang membahasakan diri mereka 'hamba', dalam usaha sentiasa mengingati kedudukan mereka sebagai hamba Tuhan. dan dibahasakan pula orang lain sebagai 'tuan hamba' kerana segala-galanya datang dari Allah, dan pada masa yang sama mengingatkan diri agar sentiasa merendah diri.

pelikkah kita apabila peribahasa "biar mati anak jangan mati adat" disebut-sebut nenek moyang kita? sedangkan kisah Nabi Khidir dan Nabi Musa memberitahu kita telah dibunuh seorang kanak-kanak oleh Nabi Khidir, kerana tidak mahu anak itu menyesatkan ibu bapanya yang alim kelak.

sekiranya adat telah bersulamkan agama, apa lagi yang perlu dipelikkan?

tetapi yang kita lihat sekarang jauh berbeza, mati terus adat itu dibunuh anak.

saya tidak mahu berleter panjang, kerana saya bukanlah seorang pakcik tua yang terkenang-kenangkan zaman dahulu kala.

saya hanyalah seorang pakcik muda, yang risaukan masa depan.

bukan sahaja masa depan saya, masa depan keturunan saya, dan masa depan bangsa saya.

teringat saya kepada kata-kata Hang Tuah, takkan Melayu hilang di dunia.

mungkin saya salah faham maksud beliau.

mungkin dia bukan ingin menyatakan yang Melayu itu takkan hilang.

mungkin dia telah merenung ke masa hadapan, lalu terkejut.

"takkan Melayu hilang di dunia?!?"

sekian sahaja dari saya.

salam.

Catch up.

A friend of mine very recently said "Bloggers adalah orang yang paling poyo sekali. (Nak kena) Cerita pasal hari ni pergi pasar, hari ni beli ikan, bla3."

Of course only after that did he find out I blogged as well. Lol.

Personally I think its not exactly a cry for attention as he thinks it is, it is more of an expression of my thoughts.

True, some bloggers would commit suicide if there aren't any hits to their blog, they promote their writings all over the place, and some actually make money from their blogs, but not me.

I barely ever promote my blog, nor do I intend to do so in the near future.

Even as I stop moving, the world around me continues to move on.

I guess its safe to assume the world doesn't revolve around me.

Its just a place I think out loud. Without actual talking.

A few months back I joined Twitter, simply because a friend suggested it.

I liked it initially, but now, not so much.

Twitter is a place where people that don't get enough attention in real life go to.

It gives you the feeling that you're not alone in this world.

Someone is always listening in to your thoughts and feelings.

And yes, it makes you feel great sometimes, but at the end of the day, you know its all not true.

You're still alone.

Don't get me wrong, it has its uses, like venting, or subtly letting ppl know what you think, and I still do use it.

Although not as often.

Don't even get me started on 4square. LOL.

I suddenly feel the urge to be fit. I want to be fit. I want to be healthy.

I want to be buff. LOL.

I've been exercising more regularly. Push-ups, sit-ups, lifting dumbells.

I'm actually considering of going jogging.

Can you actually imagine? Me actually wanting to go for a jog? LOL.

I think all this positive thinking can be attributed to me feeling like I have a lot of energy to do stuff.

Which I think is due to my new job.

My old job, literally, sucked all the energy out of me.

When I think about it, I go home at 3 pm, I should have the whole day ahead of me to do stuff.

But I did nothing. I just went back home, and slept.

I did not feel like doing anything, did not feel like meeting anyone.

I felt like I had zero energy. I was miserable.

I see that now.

Because just yesterday, immediately after work at 6pm, I went straight to Sunway Pyramid to watch Real Steel with a bunch of friends, and later we hung out at a mamak place until it was 3 am.

And I felt that we left too soon. Still wanted to hang out more.

This feels great.

I really feel that my life is beginning to unfold.

Its that feeling you get when you've been waiting for a movie for so long, and right now you're inside the cinema, and they've just widened the screen after the previews.

Even when I stop moving, the people around me move on.

Guess its time I started moving on and try to catch up.

Peace.

Pursuit of happiness.

I honestly had hoped to drown myself in work once I started this job.

And at first it seemed like I could. Work seemed endless.

Deadlines were getting closer with each passing second.

Time flew by like you're having fun, only you weren't.

You were working. Hectic.

I loved it.

Better tons of work rather than no work.

But deadlines have passed, reports issued, drawings submitted.

Now is the laid back period.

No longer do I stay at the office to leave at only 10 pm.

I leave on time now.

I probably won't be as busy as before until next month, when deadlines start rising from the dead.

Its funny.

I used to go back from work at 3 pm, and I didn't have time for anything.

Now I go back at 6 pm, and I have loads of time to do stuff.

I'm generally occupied on each weekend, always having stuff to do, people to meet.

If only I had time before.

I've actually found time to work out!

Yeah, I found that my shirts were way too big for me, so it made me look funny.

Since I can't exactly afford slim-fit shirts that fit my body precisely, I decided to make my body fit my clothes.

And suprisingly, its working.

I'm not sure if its me psycho-ing myself into believing I've gained weight (because I checked and I may have lost more weight), or my exercising is building up my upper body muscle or something, but my clothes really do look better on me nowadays.

It no longer looks like I bought a size too big, its got a nicer fit to it. So yeay.

Oh, it may also have something to do with me incorporating some walking in my daily routine.

I purposely park my car a bit far from the train station, so that I have to walk at least 40 minutes daily.

10 minutes from car to train station, 10 minutes from KLCC station to office. And backwards when going home.

And since they give free newspaper at the KLCC train station, I'm more up to date on current affairs now.

And I have just started bringing a book to work, so that while I'm on the train, I can read something, instead of listening to the same songs on my phone.

And oh, I actually take my breakfast now. Haha. Coz everyday I will walk past this kueh stall, and there would be this pretty girl selling the kueh. LoL.

At first I looked from afar, but one Friday I decided the next Monday I would start getting my breakfast from this stall.

The day I start buying kueh from this stall, is the day that girl disappears.

Talk about bad timing. rofl. Oh well, at least I eat better now. I take vitamins as well.

What else... Oh, I've put some money for some investment, so for this month, money's a bit short.

But my plan of financial independence by 40 has finally gotten on track.

Things are really taking off now. Except for that.

Oh well, in the pursuit of happiness, sadness is inevitable.

But learn from that sadness, and someday you'll turn those tears into tears of joy.

A nice song to listen to, nice video too.

Money.

I was alone this weekend. My cousin / housemate went back to Ipoh to fetch his parents to go for my other cousin's wedding ceremony. I went to the wedding as well, but I didn't go back to Ipoh, because my mother took a train to Seremban. My father couldn't come because he had to take care of my grandmother who isn't in the state to travel long distance, and he himself isn't in the pink of health, but slowly recuperating.

The newly-weds weren't really newly-weds. They got married a few months back, if memory serves, and couldn't hold a ceremony because the wife was studying in Australia, and came back only for a short while to get married. The kenduri was ok, though there were things that my mother and my aunt spotted that could have been improved. Perhaps future family weddings will be better.

Just now, as I was playing Crysis 2, and after dying and dying at the same spot for a couple of times, I suddenly got really dizzy. Upon realizing I hadn't had dinner and it was already 9.15 pm, it must've been because I was hungry. After all, I had lunch at around 11 am, and had not eaten anything since. So I decided to go out to this restaurant where they had a carwash service nearby, so that I could get my car washed while I ate.

After eating, and seeing that my car was already clean, I paid for my food. It was RM7.10. I took out a RM10 note. The cashier asked me if I had 10 cents, I did not. So she gave me RM3 back, and said "Takpe lah".

Its only 10 cents, but I never liked owing people anything. 10 cents is still a debt, even if she did say its ok. I remembered there being some coins in my car, but I paid for my car wash first.

See, the car wash cost was RM9. So I gave the guy RM50, since my last RM10 I gave to the restaurant. And he gave me back my change.

So I took 10 cents from my car, went back to the cashier lady at the restaurant and gave her the 10 cents. She smiled, probably thinking it was silly of me to be so bothered about 10 cents. I said nothing and walked back to my car.

Walking back to my car, I passed the car wash guy. Then it hit me.

"Tadi saya bagi u RM50 kan? U bagi saya RM1 saje balik."

"Eh tak, u bagi RM10."

I open my wallet to check.

"Eh betul la, saya bagi u RM50, u bagi saya RM1 saje. Betul."

He goes back to check his cash box.

He holds up a RM50 note. The one that I just gave.

"Ini duit u ke?"

"Ye, ye tu duit saya."

He looked skeptical.

"Kalau duit tak cukup, nanti saya punya gaji kena potong."

"Betul, betul, saya bagi u RM50 tadi", I said as earnest as I could.

He took out RM40 and gave me my correct change.

If the cashier had the exact change for my RM10, I wouldn't have owed her 10 cents.

If I had not owed her 10 cents, I wouldn't have thought of grabbing the 10 cents in the car.

If I had not taken the trouble to pay the 10 cents, I wouldn't have passed the car wash guy again.

If I had not passed the car wash guy the second time, I wouldn't have remembered.

I would have paid the car wash guy RM50, took back the RM1, and obliviously went on home, and I would've lost RM40.

Because of that near-worthless 10 cents, I saved RM40.

Everything happens for a reason. Everything.

We just can't see the reason sometimes.

Maybe its because we're not really looking.

"My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind."

"Science without religion is lame. Religion without science is blind."

- Albert Einstein.

Hanya Engkau yang aku maksudkan, dan keredhaanMu aku tuntuti, ya Allah.

Peace.